Notes from a TSQL trench

Database stuff,
with a side of memes.

Long-form notes on TSQL performance, Extended Events, Query Store and the tooling around them. Written from the trenches, not the slide deck.

60 posts 4 series 108+ memes
Extended Events Timezones

Extended Events Timezones

Open an XE event file in SSMS and the timestamps stare back at you. Local time or server time? I spun up a container in another timezone to find out.

Investigation 3 min read Extended Events · Docker
The SQLBits 2022, or There and Back Again

The SQLBits 2022, or There and Back Again

My first in-person conference, my first time speaking, and a costume that needed a face mask. A SQLBits 2022 recap told in Lord of the Rings quotes.

Non-technical 7 min read sqlbits · Personal
SQL Wordle Series - Part One: Cheating

SQL Wordle Series - Part One: Cheating

Your Twitter feed is probably already full of Wordle posts, so why not one more? Let's start the series the lazy way: by cheating.

How to 4 min read Wordle
Expecting Subvertations

Expecting Subvertations

How can 15 be less than 13? A perfect storm of bad assumptions about sql_variant comparison rules.

Investigation 5 min read Debugging
How to audit data modifications with surgical precision

How to audit data modifications with surgical precision

A colleague needed to find who was changing a specific cell in a busy table. SQL Audit was too noisy, Query Store too vague. I found a way to combine triggers with Extended Events for surgical precision.

Investigation 8 min read Extended Events · Debugging
IS Lock in RCSI Enabled Database

IS Lock in RCSI Enabled Database

I found an IS lock in a deadlock report on an RCSI database. That shouldn't be possible. Here's what caused it.

Investigation 6 min read Extended Events · Debugging